Finally... sick leave as it should be: sat in the garden, sun shining, strategically-placed cushion under my operation scar, newspaper, music on, nowt to do all afternoon but sit on my arse and eat grapes - the Grapes of Sloth.
Been a while to get here though. Went into hospital last Thursday night, operation on Friday, painful recuperation all last week, gradually fading to just bloody uncomfortable.
And on the second night, lying in hospital, I had a dream about oil pipelines. And woke up with an erection (eat your heart out Jung). It was painful (I've got a catheter in, remember), but reassuring - at least something's still working down there.
Sunshine promised tomorrow. I'm going to be as brown as a nut by the time I finally get back to work. Ah well, not as though any of them have sent me a get well card, so fcukem. Hand me a grape.
